Normally, the mere mention of snow in a forecast is enough to set my nerves on edge. Even though I have only ever been involved in one snow-related driving incident (which was not my fault and left me at the bottom of a considerable hillside next to the roadway), I absolutely hate driving on the stuff. Maybe it’s because my mom was always nervous about driving during wintry weather, or it could be because my dad once drove he and I into a ditch on a snow-covered road. Whatever the reason, I just have never been crazy about getting behind the wheel when the pavement is white.

This year, however, I am prepared. Back in October, I purchased an all-wheel drive Subaru Outback, meaning12068484_10156192569090217_3550597484536865080_o when the roads are treacherous this year, I will have four wheels on them instead of just two. We actually had some snow last night, but not enough to make for bad driving conditions. Nevertheless, as I watched last night’s forecast and awoke to snow-covered fields this morning, I couldn’t help but notice that the nervous feeling I usually get was not present. It was as if knowing I had a road-ready vehicle alleviated my usual fears, and I didn’t give them a second thought all day long.

If only I could achieve that kind of peace when it comes to all the other areas of my life that cause me anxiety. There is a certain peace in knowing everything is going to be okay, and that is a peace I have been missing as of late. Maybe my faith is lacking. Maybe I’ve seen and experienced too much stuff these past few months. Maybe I’m just a pessimist at heart. I could speculate all day long, but the fact of the matter is a lot of the time I don’t feel like everything is going to be okay. That, to say the least, is very troublesome to me.

I wish the solution to this was as easy as buying a new car. It takes time. It takes faith. It takes patience. It also takes courage, because change is often required for things to work out right. Like most people, I don’t adjust particularly well to change, so this current season of life has been a real challenge for me. I want to believe the impossible can occur and that I can dream big again, but the deck seems to be stacked against me. So I keep plugging along, hoping and hoping and hoping…

I know, though, that there is some solution out there to help me deal with this depression that is currently weighing me down. It may come in the form of a person or a word or some new opportunity, but I know it exists. Until something changes, though, I guess I’ll keep white-knuckling the wheel on this road of life, because my vehicle is not quite equipped for all the rough terrain it’s facing. Maybe one day it will be.

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