I give up. I can’t write. I just have to face up to it. I’ve sat at this keyboard and started umpteen different posts and haven’t finished a single one of them. I’m blocked up like a dam. See? I can’t even come up with clever metaphors (And, yes, I know that was a simile. That’s how bad things have gotten.).

So, in the absence of the ability to string basic sentences together, I’m just going to start talking … er, writing. This post may have twenty different subjects or just two, but, dang it, I am going to write something … today, I say!

Cue the bullet points…

  • I recently started a new medication for my depression. In something of a surprise, the psychiatric doctor I met with suggested I might have bipolar 2. The word “bipolar” seems so much harsher than “depression,” but the doc sold me on trying something different, mainly because I really can’t tell that any kind of antidepressant has ever made a great deal of difference in my life. I’m now trying out Zyprexa, a drug whose biggest claim to fame is apparently its ability to cause weight gain. Why would I take such a drug? Well, that’s because my insurance refused to cover the Latuda the doctor actually prescribed. So now I have to go through, like, three other drugs not working before I can get to the one I was actually prescribed in the first place. Viva healthcare.
  • I didn’t like that last paragraph at all … but I will keep going…
  • I recently saw a study published by Help Musicians UK stating that musicians and people working in the music industry could be more than three times as likely to suffer from depression than, well, everyone else. As someone who plays a musical instrument or two, I found the results of this study to be very interesting. Then I heard about Chris Cornell, and I realized just how deep the hole can go. Yes, for whatever reason, the struggle is definitely real.
  • NBA reporting is terrible. Awful. If I see the words “sources say” again in an NBA-related article, I will scream. The only deal I’ve seen reporters get right was the Gordon Hayward to Boston deal, and I’m sure that only happened because ESPN drools over anything coming from the east coast. Seriously, reporters whiffed on the Paul George and Chris Paul deals, acting totally surprised by both. I don’t know who these “sources” are, but they know absolutely nothing.
  • Speaking of awful, this post is terrible … but I will keep going…
  • I think part of the reason I’ve had trouble writing is that I’ve struggled to find the meaning in things lately. It feels like I’m sort of floating through life right now. To write requires a certain amount of passion, and I just haven’t had it recently. Even thinking about seminal works such as George Orwell’s 1984 or John Steinbeck’s The Grapes of Wrath seem like just words on a page right now. I’m not sure what the answer is, but I need to find some sort of inspiration again … or there will be more posts like this one, that just ramble on and don’t really say anything.

Okay, I think I’ve written just enough to realize I probably shouldn’t have written anything today, but I appreciate your indulging me for a few moments. Writing is hard, by the way. Just look at a few Facebook statuses and you’ll realize how difficult it is to type coherent sentences. This is not the post I wanted it to be … but I will keep going…

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